Friday, March 26, 2010

mood sayu

ayahku kawen lagi..
dengan si dara jelita..
lalalalalalala...~

ish...biar betol. ahak. x lah. now nga de mood nk dgr lagu klasik. A Ramlie, L Ramlee, Ahmad Jais, Broery..yess minat sgt3.. memg type2 klasik kan ak ni..hihi.

cakap pasal ayah, umm.. how 2 say ah? lately we never had a chance to talk, apatah lagi nk gossiping. yea. my dad sgt3 bz. how i miss him. truly. dr muda smpai skrg asyik dgn kerja. long time ago, ak penah x jmpa my dad 4 a month walhal duduk satu rumah jea. that was my auntie said. mana tidaknya, beliau balik kerja, ak da tdo. ak nk pegi skola pagi, beliau belum bgun tdo lg. it prolonged up to 1 month.. masa tu mcm2 rasa ade. sekarang, ak da ade life dan merantau ke sana sini lagi la no time to talk even no boundary communications sekalipon. why ah? i do my best to get close. till now. he's different. i dun know. tp certain time i can remember, beliau sgt ambil berat. ingat lg masa ak mula2 masuk kolej, 5 in the morning he called me to wake up and pegi orientasi cepat2..terharu sgt2!. haha. the sweetest thing i can remember. *cry*

now, ak da apply univ dkt dgn rumah. y? bcoz i want to be with my family. i know we are not close to each other. but chances come and go. once it's coming, quickly grab it. that's what i try to do now..kalau boleh, ak nk quit study and be with mama. but kalau x keje bagus mcm mana nk support mama.,. yes. i know our time is very limited. dia pon xkan lama kt dunia ni. bukan nk doa, tp itu hakikat. selagi ada masa, akan aku isi masa2 tersebut.akan ak luangkan masa bersama.akan ak manfaatkan!. akan ak appreciate segala2nya.. dia pon ade ak jea nk diharapkan dan sebagai peneman bicara, kawan suka duka, sbg driver di hujung minggu, sbg tukang urut, teman ke mana2 saja...*ahh! now i'm crying!*....Ya Allah. Kau kuatkan lah semangatku ..

everytime i missed her, i will cry. tp sampai skrg, ak xkn lupa peristiwa ni. masa ak kat kl dulu, dia salu bekalkan ak dgn lauk pauk. kdg2 masak byk so that my fwen kat kl semua leh mkn.furthermore dorg memg suke sgt my mom's cooking. kdg2 bekal cukup utk perut ak sorg jea.. yg x thn sgt tu, dia suke sgt masak sweet sour ikan kerapu. bila sampai kl dr kuantan, ak bukak lauk, ak makan, ak nangis...teresak2.terhinggut2. ak stop eating. pegi tepi dinding nangis mcm org gila. lagi ak makan lagi kuat ak nangis. nk buang syg. in my mind, mcm2 berlingas. sampai bila ak dpt mkn sedap mcm ni? nant kalau da sampai masa dia xde, siapa dpt masak camni utk ak? kalau ak masak xkn sama mcm air tgn dia. rindu, sedih, semua ade.
uhu...sekarg pon sama, still menangis lg. tp da kurang sikit kot. sbb ak hari2 blh balik jmpa beliau. nk kata dekat, umm.. jauh la jugak. tp ok lah.



-childhood-
that was then..now no more


selagi korg ade mak ayah, appreciate lah seadanya. hidup cuma skali. once da sampai masa dorg xde, terimalah seadanya jugak..tp semasa hayat masih ada, jgn sia2kan dorg..

2 comments:

Dany Quecera said...

ap gna 'public phone' dlm poket? kasi kol la ur dady ma...tapi...

gua tetap sebak dgn entry u kali nie.isk3. (my parent are my soul)

~bi[L]LY^LiL[L]Y~ said...

umm..yes.. sebak tu memg r sebak..
i wanted a happy family like anyone else but mine are different.....
kalau sy x ubah difference itu siapa lagi kan.